Cycling Coach? Or International Assassin?

My husband is the go-to junior development coach for "USA Cycling"  or an international crime fighter. I haven't decided which, yet, so I'll present both sides of the story and invite you to be the judge. A few points of fact for your consideration:

1. He's a bad-ass cyclist. As in, kind of the best. As in, made a living winning races for several years. As in, accolades up the you-know-what.

2. He leaves for extend periods of time wearing nothing but spandex. And often at a moments notice and always with little explanation.

3. His phone rings at all hours, and I don't recognize any of the numbers.

4. Several times a year, he travels abroad on behalf of "USA Cycling" to work with kids in the junior development program. During these "camps" I can't call him (those roaming charges!) and  can only Skype with him during specific times of the day. And the reception is often fuzzy.

5. His contacts at "USA Cycling" have names like Mark, and Jim, and Fred.

6. Once our neighbor's cat was stuck in a tree. And he proceeded to rescue this cat, despite "debilitating allergies"' with ninja-like precision.

7. I am immersed in the current season of Scandal, and therefore suspicious of everyone.

What I do know is that we love him desperately, and miss him terribly. And once he has restored peace to the far corners of our world, OR helped junior cyclists gain exposure on an international stage, we can't wait for him to come home.

Until that time, I don't plan to touch a razor. Or the lawn mower. Which is a little bit liberating.

So, it is with this presentation of the factual information that I realize I am either married to Mr. Big of the cycling world, or an international ninja for hire. Whatever. Frankly, I'm fine with either.